For probably the past 4 years I’ve been having this inner ‘struggle’ between who I am (then) and who I am (now). For years I was dieting, lifting heavy weights and competing. It was what I loved, what I knew and what I enjoyed. However…. That slowly started to change. I was feeling stuck.

I started feeling stuck! Training felt like an effort! Food prepping was an effort! And as a result, my motivation was non-existent! For the first time ever the thing that was the most consistent and reliable in my life felt pointless! The one thing that I felt I had control over when everything else felt out of control.

Who am I if I’m not…. this?

The past few years have been an eye-opener in so many ways. I have done soooooooo much work on ME! A sh!t load of inner work that in turn raised my conciousness and the way I see things and myself has changed so much!

feeling stuck

Feeling stuck and hiding behind physical appearance

See, without realising it, we get attached to things, to people… and we end up defining ourself with that, or rather, we let things and people define us! It can be a friend, a spouse, your family or it can be money, your car or your job.

The reason I have felt stuck was because I allowed my passion to define me. It did play a big role in my life. I think a part of me needed bodybuilding to get through stages in my life that I may not have been able to cope with without it. My training and dieting kept me focused and diverted my attention from the inner battles I was fighting. But I am not that person anymore.

Why am i feeling stuck?

Allowing the Universe to lead without being attached to the outcome

Coming freshly into 2023, I have become aware of the fact that I have finally shed the old me. The person that needed something to believe in, something that wouldn’t let her down, the one thing she could control……….

Truth is, we can’t control anything.

Why am I feeling stuck?

My mentor and good friend who I actually met through one of my amazing clients often gives me “by the way, I think you’ll find this interesting” books, which he politely leaves on the coffee table before he ends our mind training session. He recently introduced me to The Map Of Consciousness Explained by Dr David R. Hawkins which I basically inhaled as soon as I started reading it. In this book Dr David R. Hawkins talks about the body as a vehicle and says “In health, this powerful truth is the shift from ‘I am a body’ to ‘I have a body’. The average person is preoccupied with the body, its functioning, its performance, appearance and survival. People typically identifies the body as ‘me’ and therefore pour much of their waking attention into how the body moves and looks and what it measures. This is a very limited level of consciousness.”

The “Aha” moment and manifestation

Reading that made me realise that I have evolved. My passion was so limited to building the physical body and keeping the mental side in check that I didn’t look after the most important part! I have a body. I am a soul.

My passion exceeds the physical appearance. It’s about overall health and well-being and healing…. Body, Mind and Soul.

You can reach any goal whether it’s body related, work related or health related, you just need to lift your vibration and ask the universe by manifesting it. I have been manifesting things my whole life without realising it!! If you don’t understand or see it now, I hope that you will experience it soon. It truly is a life changer.

Why am I feeling stuck

Guided to help others heal themselves

With this mind shift of mine, I am training differently and adding more things that will benefit my wellness in a whole and not only my physical body. I exercise because it makes me feel good, not because I have to be or look a certain way.  I have furthered my spiritual studies and I am offering energy healing to further help clients where they may face emotional, physical and mental difficulties.

I also realised that my website needs a serious update which I’m looking forward to sharing with you in the next few months.

Have you experienced a similar shift?



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